Wednesday, November 11, 2009

A Celebration...

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We are so excited to celebrate Gavin's life and the impact our little boy had on this world.  We want you to join us!  We don't care if you have never met Gavin in person -- if he has made an impact on your life then we want you to join us in remembering the spirit of hope, joy and love he spread to this world.

In the midst of our sadness we find hope and joy knowing how many people's lives have been forever changed by Gavin's three short years of life here on earth. 

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Join us on Sunday, November 15 at 3 pm for a Celebration of Life to honor Gavin Owens. From 3 - 4 pm there will be time to express your thoughts and condolences to Adam and Karen Owens. At 4 pm, a special service will be held to celebrate Gavin's time with us and rejoice that he is now very much alive in Heaven. (Childcare will be provided for children ages 5& under in the Church Nursery from 3-5pm.)

Services wil be held at Morning Star Fellowship : 100 Limkiln Rd, Bechtelsville, Pa 19505

In lieu of flowers, contributions may be made to 3E Patient Care Unit at the Alfred I Dupont Hospital for Children. Your contribution may be mailed to Nemours Partnership for Children's Health 1600 Rockland R. Wilmington DE. 19803

Monday, November 9, 2009

Healing...

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Is it really possible to be healed without actually receiving what most would consider a physical healing?  I think so.  Yesterday at 10:42pm Adam and I witnessed first hand the total healing of our little boy.  While snuggled up with Mommie and Daddy Gavin slowed his breathing and his little heart stopped beating -- his body found complete and total healing.

Gavin's death was one filled with so much sorrow and hurt yet so much peace and joy flowed freely in that room.  Our little boy is healed.  Our hearts are hurting so bad and will forever miss our little fighter yet the sense of peace that flows is so beautiful and indescribable.


You have no need to fight anymore my sweet little boy. 

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Another Long Night...

We are so tired.  Tired is probably not even a good enough word for the state we are in.  Watching our child suffering is unbearable.  Gavin spent most of the night with O2 levels in the low 60's to low 50's -- yet he is still trying to keep going.  His lungs are almost completely filed with fluid and his is swollen and grey.  We are having so much difficulty keeping him comfortable.  He is on lethal doses of narcotics and we also started with sedation medications -- but he is still building tolerance as the hours go by.  His CO2 levels are probably so high at this point that he really isn't cognitively intact anymore but it is very difficult to hear him cry out.

I sat with him for a few hours last night and rested by hand of his chest just praying that each breath would be his last -- that he would realize that he didn't need to fight anymore.  He could stop suffering. 

Today we are stopping all fluids is hopes it will help this process.  We are also seeing if we can begin Propofol to help him stay sedated and peaceful.

We can feel your prayers.  Through all of this Adam and I have a sense of peace -- knowing that the end will be a moment of joy and freedom for his tired body. 

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Looking Back...

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Our Fighter...

Wow-- what a past 48 hours it has been.  Gavin is still fighting and we are just waiting for him to find peace.  Yesterday around 3pm we made the decision to remove Gavin from the biPap as it was just acting like a ventilator and he was not triggering his own breaths.

We all mourned and cried as we said our final goodbye.  The doctors waited in anticipation of the inevitable but that still, 8 hours later has not happened.  Gavin decided to breath on his own.  He is not breathing well and is only sating in the upper 70's right now and his lungs are filling with secretions.

This is not what we expected -- this is not what anyone expected.  His CO2 levels are rising which may give him a peacful death but also triggers his body to breath.  The doc said that when an individuals O2 is in the upper 70's they will see a cycle begin to occur.  The body is triggered to breath and the O2 goes up a bit and then falls back down -- that's where we are at.  It will not be until be is in the low 70's that his body will probably not be able to recover and then he will finally be at peace.

Adam and i are a mess.  Yesterday when we took him off the biPap we mourned the loss of our baby boy.  To have to watch him go through a slow death is almost unbearable.  It will happen and we know that but it is difficult for us to see him as we already kinda let him go.

Madison is having a very difficult time as well and is very confused.  My family came back to the hospital today and Madison did not want to come.  She didn't understand why she had to come back -- why we were still here, if Gavin was already in Heaven.  It's so hard. 

Please pray so hard Gavin can stop fighting and just finally find some peace.  He has fought so hard his entire life this is the only thing he knows how to do.  It is horrible watching him go through this.  We feel like we are having to watch him die twice.