Wednesday, September 1, 2010

{First Day of School}

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The day has come and gone -- Madison's first day of Kindergarten.  It's kinda crazy where I am mentally and emotionally at the end of this monumental day.  I am so proud of my little girl.  I looked at her this morning and I saw a beautiful little lady -- perfect in every way, even in her imperfection.  I saw my baby who not so long ago I held in my arms -- fitting perfectly in the bend of my arm.  She has grown in so many ways.


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Grief is a crazy thing.  It seems to sneak up at the most unexpected time.  As we prepared Madison for her first day of school I couldn't help but be constantly reminded that we were supposed to be doing this as a family of four.  I know Gavin was totally watching her get on that big yellow bus and probably -- most likely,  totally freakin' out and kicking his skinny little legs with excitment up in heaven!


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I have lots of wonders about this upcoming school year. This is just a weird place in the journey of parenthood.  Today was the first day that I was not in complete control of my child's life.  Giving up control is a difficult thing for this type A Mommie.  As scary as it is -- I guess amazing freedom can be found in giving up a little control -- pushing her a little further out of the nest and trusting that God will give her a safe landing and show her the most spectacular view on the way to her destination.


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Ok -- here we go.  One day down, Oh so many more to go!

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

can't believe Madi's in school! how did she like it? She's getting so pretty!

Nathan Duvall said...

I bet this day has been so surreal for you guys - I can't imagine the range of emotions - but I'm afraid we'll know soon enough... they grow up so fast. Love these pictures too, incredible.

Anonymous said...

I was imagining Gavin looking for her at the end of the day, and how excited he 'd be to greet her as she got off the bus! I remember how each of the younger ones looked forward to the older one/s returning at the end of the day. Only 179 days to go- kindergarten didn't seem as traumatic for me as first grade was! ;) Remind me of that next year when Evan goes & Elizabeth is a senior!

Chris said...

It IS an incredible mix of emotions isn't it??
The joy on their faces helps replace the sadness in your heart.

We started a tradition in our area. Every first day of school, we mom's all met for breakfast when the bus left. Some years there were a few of us, others there were more than a dozen. It really helped fill the bit of emptiness that was left when the bus rolled away.

Phyllis said...

I totally understand some of those feelings. When L lost her first tooth, after all the excitement we had a moment of sadness when we realized that N & B won't have that typical milestone. That first day of school is surreal regardless of your situation. As parents we teach them everything they know up until then and all of a sudden other people will be teaching them things. I hope she had a good day!!

Anonymous said...

What a beautiful family you guys are...you are my inspiration. You guys are an incredible couple and incredible parents. I'm sure Gavin is very proud. We are too!

Heidi said...

Awww, love the 1st day photos Karen. Love the one of her running to you. "K" is always hard on us moms. I know Gavin was beaming with pride. So what are you going to do with yourself those few hours?! hugs-
Heidi & Jack.

Ckinneer said...

My oldest, Caleb, started Kindergarten this year also! I completely understand the Type A Mom anxiety! :) The pictures are beautiful and I am absolutely sure that Gavin was so excited to watch her from heaven!

Ellen said...

First day of kindergarten brings lots of mixed emotions! Exciting for the kids, hard for the parents. It was very hard to not know exactly what my kids were doing all day while they were in kindergarten..that loss of control...having them out of your sight and in someone elses hands. Its tough. Mostly on us parents! lol Madi is sooo cute and such a happy looking child! She will do sooo good in school!

Gilda said...

Ah! yes the first day of kindergarten remember it all very well when I sent my daughter it was a day of emotions. She is in high school now and seeing Madi's pics just reminded me of that sweet day.Looks like Madi had a blast she is so beautiful.

JayCee said...

GREAT PIX>>>>>What a momentous day!

Ash said...

Aw, the first day of "K"! It's exciting and so hard to watch them walk onto that bus...all in the same moment. I hope she had a great first day and enjoys the school year!

Beautiful pics, beautiful girl, beautiful family.

Anonymous said...

Hey at DuPont Children's hospital do they have a Sibling room? I live in St.Louis and I am working at the children's hospital here in their child care center for the doctors and in the Sibling room in the hospital.

Lindsey