When I was pregnant with both Madison and Gavin I never really got to experience a lot of the things that new mommies to be often experience. Madison was born at 34 weeks, but I had been on strict bed rest since around 24 weeks and never really got to experience all the fun stuff that comes along with carrying a baby inside your belly. Then of course with Gavin I was on bed rest from around 20 weeks on and my water broke at 28 weeks leaving me sitting in a hospital bed for two weeks until he made his entrance. I never had a baby shower, I never was able to fully enjoy the moments that come before the baby actually get here.
This time it's so different.
Even though I'm obviously not growing this little one in my body -- the thought of her is totally growing in my heart and soul. I feel like, what I can assume mommies to be feel towards the end of their pregnancy. When will it happen? -- what will the baby look like? -- what will it feel like, and so many other fun things.
Adoption is amazing on so many levels. I expect there to be challenges but so far it's all just really cool. Even if this little girl currently trying to get isn't the one for us -- eventually we know it will happen. I find myself wanting to prepare and get ready -- almost like that nesting phase. The only difficult part it that we do need to step back a little. Our excitement for this little girl is growing stronger everyday but we need to remember in the back our of minds that we may or may not be her mommie and daddy -- and we need to be ok with that.
We were told to have questions ready for our meeting on Tuesday with DHS and all the child's and agency's workers -- it's so awkward, because if I could I would make the meeting last all day! I want to know everything about her. Everything from her birth story to how she finds comfort. What are her favorite sounds -- what makes her smile?
Oh goodness -- the excitement is overwhelming!