Wednesday, May 23, 2012

{Embracing The Process}

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Life is all about process. We as a culture want everything fast -- we are an impulsive people group.  But truth is very rarely does a good thing happen without a process preceding it. These past weeks have been so difficult with Jayden.  There are certain behaviors that he has that developed as a result of his first two years of life that we are determined to help him overcome.  These behaviors are self harming and really hold him back from reaching his full potential.  We dealt with some of the same behaviors with Angela, and I think these behaviors are probably pretty common with kids like Angela and Jayden who seek sensory input and are not able to find in their environment.  

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It's so easy for us to just want to snap our fingers and fast forward -- but that's just not how life works. It's in the process that amazing things happen.  It's so important to live in the moment and not always be wanting and hoping for the future -- we will miss out on so much!  Its though our sweat and tears that amazing bonding will happen, growth will occur and love will deepen.

I know for sure God delights in process.  It's during our times of waiting that our need for him is most seen.  I feel like sometimes He even makes us wait longer, and maybe even with a smirk on his face,  just to get us off our high horse and recognize that we simply can't do this thing called life on our own. When will we learn?  When will I learn?  As I said in a previous post -- I was never meant to do this alone.  

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Jayden is teaching me so much about myself, forcing me to slow down, reorganize and re-approach.  Being a mommie to both birth and adopted children requires me to think outside the box.  What works for one child will not work for another.  In some ways it gives me this huge arsenal of strategies because all my children need different approaches.  

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I feel like I'm rambling on, and I guess I kinda am.  I needed to hear this today.  I need to be reminded to embrace the process.  Good things are right around the corner, but if I focus so much on the future I might miss out on some amazing moments happening right now.

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**sigh

I'm embracing the process.

4 comments:

Kirsten Yarnall said...

Take comfort in knowing that you are like every other mother who makes efforts daily to recognize and then meet the individual needs of each of their children. Natural or adopted, well or special needs, each child (just like each person on this earth)has their own unique personality with their own unique set of needs. I have just recently told Trey that Mark and I have never parented a teenager before and he has never been a teenager before so we just need to cut each other some slack. All of us are navigating this together very disfunctionally and that's ok. God does not call us to be perfect or to have all the answers at our fingertips. He simply asks us to get up each day and give it our best shot. All of us are capable of doing that. Grace and mercy are our best friends during these challenging times and I thank God for those each and every day. You will daily embrace the process because you know what that means for those little ones of yours. That is what makes you the incredible mother that you are. I'm still on board for helping you in any way I can to bring more babies home. I was even thinking yesterday how nice "Gavin's House" sounds. Should it be Gods will........ Love you Karen!!

Kelle said...

You seem to say the things I need to hear, at just the right time. Thank you for listening to His words in your life and for taking the time to write them down for us all. From one Boyer to one living in Boyertown. :)
~Kelle B

Kelle said...

You seem to say the things I need to hear, at just the right time. Thank you for listening to His words and for taking the time to write them down for us all to read. From one Boyer to one who lives in Boyertown. :)
~Kelle

Janice Centritto said...

Karen,
I love reading your posts and they always bring me back to a time when our son Evan was little. Being adopted and special needs brought challenges that I never thought I would encounter being from a large family with a ton of "typical" children around. In my heart I knew that I had to go with the flow and just accept that God knew what he was doing. During that time, Evan had so many issues that I, at times, just never knew where to start or if I would ever see the light at the end of the tunnel... well there is light! 15 yrs later he just attended his Senior Prom and is very accepted by his classmates, despite his disability! Hang in there, the process works and you are doing an AMAZING job!